by James of The Optimus Prime Experiment- Follow him @jimmyjangles
With the terrific growth of Twitter amongst the masses and glitterati, it’s become evident that some good people are using it way too much, in a World of Warcraft kind of way too much. They might be addicted. What about yourself? Do you have a twitter related dependency?
You know you’re addicted to Twitter when:
- You went to a Tweet Up but had nothing to say to the people you met. And then immediately tweeted them about it.
- You miss ‘Fail Whale’ days.
- In an emergency, you tweet to @911.
- ‘Hash Browns’ is your favourite new in joke.
- You were served court papers on Twitter because you no longer user Face Book.
- You are jealous of anyone who has more followers than you.
- You tweet your partner to turn out the light. When you’re both in bed.
- Your mother gets a Twitter account just so she can ask if you’re coming home for Christmas.
- You keep tweeting to your favourite celebrity in the forlorn hope they reply.
- You get upset if no one selects you for #followfriday. So tweet yourself from another account.
If you nodded your head in self recognition several times as you read the list, you might be in need of help. What should you do if you suffer from twitter addiction?
You could start by removing Tweetie from your iPhone and you could delete Tweetdeck from your hard drive. Failing that you could try and take your mind off it by going to the movies, go for a run or walk, taking a loved one out for dinner but (don’t arrange it on Twitter). You could always read The Twits by Roald Dahl!
While this post is in helpfully in jest, if you feel you do have a problem, see a health professional.
@ScottWilliams
If you sign your credit card receipts or checks w/ your Twitter name…
@EzyBlogger
Haha… I guess I’m addicted coz I tweet in my sleep…lol
Back to RTs and #followfriday
@farotto
Hello, i am a health professional…I’m kidding.
Thanks for the article. It is very funny. I read other articles on your blog and I realized I have to bow to you as a source of super duper content. This site is inspiring me to gow my knowledge more and more. Thanks for the help. Really appreciated.
@rikschot
Don’t forget to add this one: “You can’t resist checking your iPhone for updates, each time you hear a bird… ”
(Yes, that was me: http://twitter.com/Rikschot/status/1504101971)
@Caroline815
When you tweet about the break up before you phone your best friend.
@writerdad
…when you add (TW) before words.
@TheSourceress
You no longer leave blog comments more than 140 characters in length!
@jmctigue
When you are sitting outside with a beautiful view and you have your head down working your Tweetie account.
@peterjrday
…When you miss deadlines at work because you are too busy tweeting.
When you dream about twitter… having images of tweetdeck flashing before you.
Or (@Caroline815) you tweet about the break up before you’ve even broken up!
@techvenkat
If you are also including @ and RT s in sending email messages ,I am not maddicted to twitter
@ivospigel
As I tweeted a few weeks ago: You know you’re addicted to twitter when you’re sitting on your terrace on a sunny day, hear birds chirping in the nearby trees, and think “Gee how many tweeps all around me…”
@vegasgeek
When you get a window decal with your twitter handle for your new car…. (guilty)
@TheSourceress
You no longer leave blog comments longer than 140 characters!
@rob_dale
Completely agree with Roseli, I am the second one who tweets in sleep. I totally addicted to Twitter, my half of the day goes in tweeting and other half in blogging. But, its a great platform for internet marketers. In very less time twitter have made his position very strong as compare to others. I just love Twitter.!
@JDEbberly
I KNOW I suffer from Stage IV Twitter Addiction. I have an iPhone. I check my Twitter all the time. I also check on tweets at different times throughout the night, every night.
Yeah, I’m addicted to Twitter.
How about you?
@jimmyjangles
Looks like there are more of you with problems than I thought!
@hectorhenry17
I thin i have this problem lol, i reach to the point that i create a account for my wife, hoping that she tweet me frequenly.
I thing its would be good if you ad to the list: if you go sleep thinking on twitter.
Nice post i need a doc.
You think in 140 character increments…
@savingforhome
I’m officially addicted! I do miss the whale!!!
@drewmaniac
You think in 140 characters or less.
@paramendra
Funny. But also informative.
@Artomeria
“You are jealous of anyone who has more followers than you.” It’s exactly about me lol
@jessicawaters
what’s the Hash Browns joke???
@KohliConsulting
You know you are addicted to Twitter when you have eaten all the groceries except for some grits you bought 2 years ago in some kind of “phase,” and you kept on Tweeting past the time all the grocery and convenience stores closed, and you would have cooked the grits anyway, except for the fact that the water was turned of 2 weeks ago, and the gas for the stove was turned off a week before that, and you haven’t showered or shaved in several days because you are obsessed with making it to 10,000 followers by noon on Sunday, and you fall asleep on your key board and wake up groggy and look in the mirror only to see that the keys of your laptop have made a tile mosaic set of impressions on the left side of your face, and then you remember the sheriff is coming on Monday to evict you, and the bank is foreclosing on your house, because you haven’t made it to work in months, and you think how did it ever come to this… maybe Twitter really is dangerous, maybe it could hurt the economy, maybe the divorce rate will go up, and ma…..
@ariherzog
The moment you start dreaming of TweetDeck is when you stared at the screen too long.
@nowthatsmint
you’re basically addicted if you made an effort to read this article
busted!
@mmangen
I’m laughing pretty hard at these….for me, I knew I was addicted the first time I was put into #TTO (Twitter Time Out) for exceeding my 100 updates in an hour…I somewhat frantically called a friend to ask her if it had ever happened to her and rushed to ask “how long can I not Tweet?” When she replied, “For an hour” I asked her, “What am I supposed to do for an hour?”
I ended up washing dishes, which had piled up. Mopped the floor that had needed it for some time and my son was also happy to see that later he had clean clothes!
An hour and a half later …..(had to set some small goal for myself to see if I really could overcome the urge)…..I was happily tweeting away again!
Thanks for the humorous article!
@attractmich
it’s really addiction!
u just can not think or do something else. it’s like a fever!?!
u tweet it, tweet it! and there is no ending
@igomogul
If the first thing you do when you think you’re using Twitter too much is to see if @twitteraddicts exists, then you might have a problem.
@travelmedia
When you’re leaving a trail of feathers behind you!
@travelmedia
When you start leaving a trail of feathers behind you!
(Not sure why my original comment disappeared off radar.)
@sesa_opas
You know you’re addicted to twitter when… your dream is about reading a reply from your tweet
@indracitizens
Hahaha. I’m really addicted to twitter
@jimmyjangles
You know you’re addicted to twiitter when you come back to check on your addiction page a year later!